The heavily hyped first Ashes test will end in a disappointing draw after the shit Welsh weather intervened to prevent Australia racking up a first innings lead of 200+ by the end of day three. Day four is expected to be played underwater.
Queanbeyan refugee Mark Webber was quick in first practice for the Don't Mention The War German F1GP, but you know he's going to finish the weekend on the side of the road watching wisps of steam issue out from under the Red Bull's engine cover - or worse still, on the end of another hiding from his pre-pubescent childrens TV host teammate.
Souths won a game, which was more embarrassing than anything.
And above all - mainly as this irrelevantises a lot more than just a weekend's sporting entertainment - the Tour was decided on the uphill slog into Andorra overnight. Some French kiddie won and some Italian dude from the breakaway is in yellow, but that's not the point. The point is that the intra-Astana team fight didn't and won't eventuate. In the final kilometres, after the Astana boys had cracked the whip viciously over the entire field all day, Bruyneel sent Contador sent over the top to make up the time he was down on fading maillot jeune Fabbo Cancellara of Team Sux0r Bank, as well as teammate Armstrong. This, then, was a statement of intent from Astana: Contador will win the Tour, and Armstrong will let him. This has been the official songsheet out of Team Borat since day minus lots - that Contador was the team leader and Armstrong's only role was laying down supporting fire and getting his Nike LiveStrong logo into plenty of post-race interviews and photo-ops - but it's fairly deflating, as a nominal neutral, to see that mentality being enforced hard, early and often on the very first stage.
Because it means there is no race this year. Astana have spent far more on recruitment and have much better cattle in their squad than any other team on the tour - the sight of Cadel Evans fighting a lone, doomed hand against two to three powder-blue Borats at the pointy end of the climb told its own story, as did the anonymity of the likes of Andy Schleck or Carlos Sastre - and an Astana rider will win this tour. Credit to Bruyneel for doing what it takes to keep him in employment, and to Armstrong for doing what he said he was always going to do - ride for Contador and help him win the Tour.
That said, it'll be interesting - possibly the only thing left which WILL be interesting in this tour, given the flat stages belong to the Manx Mong and everything else to Astana - to see what the American sports media, which usually misses the nuance of tactic-heavy Euro team sports, makes of Their Golden Boy effectively being prevented from directly contending for victory by his own team. Whether he was ever up to it isn't really the point.
The Doctor is OUT.
10 comments:
ahemmm .. guards .. seize him.
Anyway - back to the cricket. The only two things that are now possible are
a) Draw. Ho-hum it's raining fucking men draw. Pity too. This is the closest the Poms will get to a winnable test with an attack like that.
b) Jesus reappears, and by similar stroke of luck it DOESN'T rain - and we end up with a 200 run lead - which should be just about enough to towel up the Poms who'll just LOVE facing really humidly swinging balls - and be too shocked to believe that Nathan Hauritz gets a ball to actually turn and capitulate for 180ish.
Shame about the weather in Cardiff. We need Warney - he'd bowl em out in 20 overs!
I still think that there is a twist in the tale with the Tour de F. I hope so anyway! We'll have to wait and see - I base this on nothing more than a hunch mind you. The tactics etc are still a little beyond me!
While there is much truth in what you say about the tour remember that last year Sastre was nowhere until the final week. Some riders get stronger as the tour goes on and Armstrong has always been one of them.
Have a look at the profile of the penultimate stage, this tour definately has a vicious last week with a real sting in the tail!
Did the tour ever not have teams. Maybe we should all pitch in and buy cadel a team.
Dude got gored to death in the running of the bulls. Surely, a highlight?.
Only that it's natural selection at it's wonderful best.
Why is it news when people running in front of bulls in a crowded street get killed by them? :P
H - England is probably the only country where the rain covers are a fricken HOVERCRAFT with SPONSORSHIP on it. Tbf they get so much use I'm not surprised. As for the bicyclists of the Tour - these are not the roids you are looking for - its the fat tryhards in the matching lycra with delusions about being to be these guys that you need to flatten.
AJ - we may be back in this if the weather holds
Lerm and Naut - hope so but if it's btw Astana it needs Lance to be in time trial distance from C*ntador near the end
Beeso - I think it's been team-decided for many many years now - basically Astana was Kazakhstan buying Vinokourov a team so why not, it'd be cheaper than Clive Palmer inventing a football team
Moko & AJ - it's not so much news as a public health warning about congenital stupidity.
Cricket's a fucking mug's game. Can't believe I'm severely sleep deprived due to an "exciting draw".
Fuck me. After yesterday's mopey Hottest 100 Of All Time, to finish the weekend with a limp-dicked draw leaves one slightly stabby.
Well I did warn ya off the top... if only the bastards didn't give us the impression they might actually have the bowling talent to take 8 wickets in three sessions.
Webber grabbing pole and the win! Fantastic, took the edge of the draw in Cardiff.
Hottest 100 - Nirvana was a shoe in. Joy Division took out no. 1 in the first two years of this listener poll so its no surprise to see it in the Jays' First XI.
The Michael Jackson listener forums certainly banded together. The interesting thing is always to see which songs the Bealtes fans and the Stones fans decide to vote on. They have their own internal polling to decide what their fans will vote for en masse.
Tour d'Astana - that hill climb where Cadel was left completely out to dry showed how scared the other teams are of Astana. Where a series of co-ordinated attacks might unnerve the Borats, the teams have decided to let Astana win. The only decisions they make will be based on what scraps they want to scuttle away with now that they've surrendered the big cheese.
Fucking Souths! I tipped Penriff.
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